okay. i really want to rant. just let me say it out. okay. work has started for me for about 2 weeks now. frankly speaking, the colleagues are nice, friendly, willing to help etc. but i've been having a very serious problem. i wonder what's wrong with my brain that i cant seem to remember a lot of things that's taught. am i having some brain tumor inside that's making things much much harder to absorb for me? maybe poly terms and university terms are really different. some things is really hard to get into my head! and i'm really frustrated over it! okay, it does sound dumb, but seriously, i asked the temp staff questions until i also quite annoyed with myself sometimes! and i also know i keep asking like quite annoying. but i really cant remember what i was suppose to do. and i have to keep track of so many things that i feel i cant! and i mean CANT multi-task at all! quite demoralized by this actually. like i thought i would be able to do okay/well, in the end i barely make it. 

and this temp staff who's teaching me, i have to say, he is having very good methods to keep track of every single thing. but there's really many steps to ways he actually do his things! and i got a feel he expects me to do things in his way. it's very hard to! even copy and paste something on excel he can correct me and say i shouldnt do that! okay he has his reason to support but then! it's really uncomfortable to follow exactly what he wants me to do! so uncomfortable until i made a mess with just copy and paste in excel. imagine that. okay, skip that. because i cant deny that he does helped me a lot in work. 

okay, end of ranting. maybe in future i will refrain from talking about such things outside. i'll just write on my blog! a good way to stop gossip? haha, maybe.